A BAD DAY. . .

Signs You're Going to Have a Bad Day

You know it's going to be a bad day when . . .

. . .Mother Nature has it in for you.

. . . your twin sister forgets your birthday.

. . . you wake up face down on the pavement.

. . . you put your bra on your pet as a joke, and it fits better.

. . . you call suicide prevention and they put you on hold.

. . . you see a "60 Minutes news team" waiting in your outer office.

. . . your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

. . . you want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party, and they aren't yours.

. . . you turn on the TV news and they're displaying emergency routes out of your city.

. . . you wake up to discover that your water bed broke and then you realize that you don't have a water bed.

. . . your horn goes off accidently and remains stuck as you follow a group of bikers on the freeway.

. . . you get a rejection notice from the HUMOR Listserver saying that you're no longer funny.

. . . your doctor tells you, "Well, I have bad news and good news..."

. . . you open the paper and find your picture under a caption that reads:
"WANTED: DEAD OR ALIVE!"

. . . your ex-lover calls and tells you he/she has 6 days to live, and that you'd better get the Test.

. . . you wake up at work naked in front of your co-workers.

. . . you have a job interview in 10 minutes and you just woke up

AND THE WORST OF ALL:

. . . you need your chocoholic fix and the government just banned chocolate!

Now then, your day really wasn't all that bad was it?